Thursday, February 24, 2011

Exhaustion and miracles....

I wasn’t going to blog today. My heart wasn’t in it.


I.
Am.
Exhausted.

Like fall asleep at my desk. Pee with my pants on. Drive with eyes closed. Kind of exhaustion.

It ain’t pretty.

Miss Banana came into our bedroom as I was getting up today. She was cuddling with Rambo and I said, “Man, I really want to go back to sleep.”

In her way too cute, innocent and soft voice, she simply said, “You can’t. You have to work. You’re old.”

Nice. Simple but true. I’m old – as in “adult”. Adults don’t sleep – they work.

Which means I probably shouldn’t have retorted back with the ever so mature “I can stay home and sleep if I want to so there.” I also probably shouldn’t have stuck my tongue out at her and stomped out.

*sigh*

I’ve been losing my grip on all the tasks I need to accomplish daily. There is work not done for the one PT job. There sits a stack of checks to be entered for PT job #2. I haven’t commented on hardly any blogs though I’ve read them all. I feel guilty. I gave myself a day off of working out and I even feel guilty for that. I didn’t cook supper. Rambo did cuz I was too tired. Board meetings have been attended. Lists updated. Eyes propped open with toothpicks.

Oh and the kitchen remodel starts soon so all week we’ve been picking up supplies. I also lost my favorite necklace and the thought of it makes me want to kick someone. My mother-in-law found the freaking Harley pants she lost months ago so now I have two pairs. So sits the one pair I need to box up and return.

It taunts me.  (Oh, by the way...they were in a bag.  A big bag.  Hanging on a coat hook.  In plain sight.)

I have to pick my kids up at that tattoo shop. Yes – you read that right. Rambo is still having work done on his back so I have to pick them up there. Mother of the year right here. My mom would have a coronary if she knew where her little granddaughters were right now.

Oh and then there’s the free food again. A pasta table with breadsticks and salad and dessert yesterday. No – I didn’t eat the salad. Today is free nachos with salsa and cheese and again with the movie-f*cking-popcorn that is like a butter orgasm in my mouth. When will it end?

I stopped pissing rainbows about 10 hours ago. Apparently I’m Satan’s sister now because the only thing I can fart out are black jelly beans.

And yet?

There is hope.

Why?

Cuz….a few minutes ago Jenny called. I saw the number, lit up and answered. Doesn’t matter if it’s a 30 second chat or a 30 minute talk…I feel better. I feel valued and I feel loved. I feel blessed. Life is good.

I need to stop crying in my pasta bowl.

You’re never gonna guess what happened next though. Never in a million years. Not now – not ever. I gotta get back to work now but I promise to write more about it Monday because tomorrow is BYOC….

I’m such a tease huh?

I promise – it’ll be good.

And let’s just say – miracles do happen.

16 comments:

Ronnie said...

Can't wait to hear about it!

Dawnya said...

I can't wait to hear about it. I need to hear something good.

~Sandi @ This one time at 'band' camp... said...

OMG, no you d'int...we have like 4 more sleeps until Monday...not fair!!!

Have a good weekend anyways!

Laura Belle said...

Holy Hell, you crack me up. It's my work's popcorn day too, so I endulged in some of that buttery goodness followed by a bowl of ice cream for breakfast. It's also the chili cook-off...I had 4, count 'em 4 bowls! Now I feel like i'm going to vomit. So what do I do?? I march right back down to the breakroom and get ANOTHER bowl of ice cream, top it with a double chocolate cookie and go to town. Do you think anyone will notice if I curl up under my desk and take a little nap?

Sandy Lee said...

WHAT!!!!

Thank god my kids are not little anymore. This morning, I rolled over and went back to sleep. Here it is 2:00 pm and I'm still in my pj's. Life is good somedays. But WHAT HAPPENED??? You can't leave us for that many days.

Laurie said...

I miss the pissing rainbows for you. Post picture of kids at tattoo place. Sorry you are so tired, maybe coming down with something, that is usually what happens when I am that tired. Not that it would be good, but it would make you have a reason to stay home, b/c then sometimes adults get to stay home for sickness...sometimes...

Karen Butler Ogle said...

I'm excited to hear your good news, Draz. Monday seems SO FAR AWAY!

L A U R A said...

Can't wait to hear the good news. Keep us posted!

Angela Pea said...

THE Pants?! She found THE Pants? Lord love a duck...

Joey said...

Lady, guilt is a 4-letter word. You work hard for the money as the song goes. Ease up! XO

Kristin said...

Get some rest, girl. And then TELL US.

Beth Ann said...

I know you are tired and frustrated, but even in your sleep you can right the hell our of a blog post. Thank you for sharing the humor in your frustration with all of us!

Tina said...

i like black jelly beans....but probably not if you are farting them :)

feel better.
xxxooo

Dizzy Girl said...

Can't wait to hear babe!!! xoxoxoxoxo

MizFit said...

monday???

WE
CAINT
WAIT!!!

Ice Queen said...

Blog tease. :P

Stay away from the buttergasms. Hot, fresh popcorn is crack. I love popcorn with a devotion that is almost slavish. Seriously. And I don't allow it too often because I totally go overboard and a healthy snack becomes a mistake of epic proportions.

Kitchen remodel? Really? How exciting! I would kill to be able to custom design my own kitchen. Six burner gas cooktop, double dual fuel convection wall ovens, two dishwashers, one standard, one two drawer, built in espresso/cappuccino maker... Okay, I am having a kitchengasm, right now.

I'm glad that you got your pants back. Not so much that you now have to return a pair... blech!

Okay, Mz. Overachiever, you need to stop feeling guilty for not getting it all done. And for not commenting as much. You are human. (Uh, you are... aren't you? ;)) There are only so many hours in a day and you do the best you can. I loves ya, girl. Whether you comment or not. So, stop putting excess pressure on your little shoulders, mmmkay? *muah!*