Monday, February 21, 2011

Watermelon + Principal = no hives or tears!!!!

Alright, where did we leave off? Oh yes – Watermelon shocked me by saying she wanted to see the Principal alone.

Naturally, most of Friday I watched the clock….thinking any minute I’d get a sobbing phone call asking me to come rescue her. I worried. I wondered what was happening and when.

I felt like that old cliché – “this hurts me more than it hurts you” – all day long because I honestly wondered which of us was more nervous and anxious.

I never got a phone call. I picked her up after school and she was smiling.

I went and talked to the teacher and I asked her how things went. The teacher said that both girls saw the Principal right away in the morning together. Later on in the afternoon, Rose started yelling at Watermelon and the teacher told them both to go see the Principal again.

The teacher said she isn’t sending Watermelon to be in trouble – but so that she can go with Rose to tell the Principal what happened so he can deal with it. She said Watermelon doesn’t raise her voice and act naughty like Rose does but she wants Rose to know that her and the Principal will not tolerate anything from her so each time she does something she’ll be going to see the Principal.

She said she is giving extra hugs to Watermelon throughout the day as she knows Watermelon is the kind of kid who needs that.

At home, I asked Watermelon how it went. She said at the first meeting, the Principal mainly talked to Rose and told her he knows she has a reputation for being disruptive and mean to students and teachers and Rose needs to make a decision about if she wants to change and be a mean kid or a nice kid. He said it won’t be tolerated.

Watermelon said it was GREAT. Ha – I’m raising an evil kid huh?

The second time Watermelon said she didn’t understand why she had to go when she did nothing wrong but I explained to her she has to tell the Principal what happened. He told them they both need to be separated if they can’t get along and moreso this time put the blame on them both.

Watermelon said she really wanted to cry that time – but she didn’t.

I told her we were VERY proud of her, for going in there, standing up for herself and standing on her own. We told her this is the first step and things will get fixed.

She said she thought she’d feel more relieved and we told her this will take more than a day to fix.

Later, I saw Rambo hugging her with her arms wrapped around him and her head against his chest and his cheek resting on the top of her head and I heard him say how proud he was….and I left them alone.

To see the man I love go from being the man dressed in a guard’s uniform trained in riot tactics to a father with a gentle voice changing who my daughter is on the inside can take my breath away.

I’m not ashamed to say that I’m jealous of my own daughter. Never, ever in my life has my dad held me that way or spoken such gentle words to me. Just for a second, I let myself imagine what that would have been like. I let myself wonder how different of a woman I would be.

And then I made the thoughts stop. I can’t go there. Or I’ll never stop being angry.

It is the past. I can’t make someone they are not. I can only be grateful my girls have what I didn’t.

I asked Watermelon throughout the day if she was proud of what she had done and proud of herself and she’d just say, “I don’t know.”

As the day ended, Watermelon came up to me and said, “You know Mom, I guess I am proud of myself.”

I only said, “Well, you should be. I couldn’t have done what you did without crying or without my mom there so you’re very strong.”

That’s the last we talked about it. And today there is no school so I don’t know what happens next.

She did say Rose told everyone what happened in the meetings and when people asked Watermelon she told them it was between her and Rose and it was private. *sigh*

So yah, that’s where it’s at right now…and I’ll keep you posted on where it’s headed.

And again…thank you all….I know your thoughts were with Watermelon…and your strength was too. Friday was proof of that.

Watermelon met with the Principal twice – without a tear or a hive in sight.

Makes me wonder if she’s really mine???


Band-Babe said...

Remember to give yourself a little credit here. Your guidance and input and hard won wisdom are giving your daughter the strength and confidence all parents should instill in their children. You are a terrific person, wife, mom, friend...

Barbara said...

I gotta say.. i am bawling my eyes out Draz.. cause that tender loving Rambo gave Watermelon is just the way Mark would handle it.. and brought back a ton of memories.. I am so happy your daughter now has the attention needed and liked reading about zero tolerance.. thats the way is should be .... your daughter (and you) should be enjoying her childhood.. not worry about bullying crap.. good for you.

Ronnie said...

So proud of her. She's growing into a young lady instead of a little girl. :)

Stephanie said...

Yea for Watermelon. Let her know that there are many older women (my age) who wish they had the courage she possesses at such a young age. let her know I am very, very proud of her!!

amandakiska said...

She's yours for sure! She's strong and smart and doesn't back down from a challenge - just like you! Wat to go, Mom!

Jacquie said...

This made me cry Draz....I am so happy that it worked out well for Watermelon and you!

Karen Butler Ogle said...

I'm so glad to hear this, Drazil. She did so well and you have made her stronger by leading her through it so well. Don't sell yourself short, dear.

Dazee Dreamer said...

I'm sure you are the proudest mom right now. I'm so glad you are helping her to be a strong woman someday. kudos to you

Read said...

Woo Hoo!!! She totally rocks!!! So do you!! Amandakiska has it exactly right!!!

LDswims said...

Of course she's yours! YOU taught her that. She learned how to stay strong, hold steady, and face fears from you. Whether you believe it about yourself or not, that IS what you do! Add to that Rambo and his strength and ability to be a major softie, your girls definitely have it better - which is every parent's dream, right? To give their children "things" they didn't have themselves? You have always been bound to stop the inadequacies from haunting another generation and now you are seeing all of your efforts at work. So you had better be taking some credit here!

I am so proud of you and Watermelon for pushing through. I have faith that this is on the mend, even if a few more rough spots happen, things sound promising!

Tina said...

I am so glad things went well on Friday..and I hope things keeping improving for you and watermelon. It sounds like you are handling it perfectly!

Bonnie said...

She is such a trooper. There is nothing more sexy than seeing a big hunk of man comforting his daughter. I am also lucky enough to have a wonderful husband who is a wonderful father to our daughters.

Beth Ann said...

It is amazing how mature she is being through all of this. I know many adults who wouldn't be able to do that. You absolutely should be proud!

Lyla said...

I'm so proud of your brave baby, and I'm proud of you too! Great work, mom!