Wednesday, June 20, 2012

WTF Wednesday!

It’s time for WTF Wednesday. You get to list random items that make you want to scream WTF and we all nod and agree with you to make you feel better!

WTF is wrong with my best friend? True story – hand to God. She posted a CLOSE UP picture of a wolf spider with babies on its back. The spider is huh-uge. Like bigger than my ass huge. I refuse to talk to her today. I told her the only way I’ll forgive her is if she sends me 6 dozen white Kit Kats.

WhyTF hasn’t someone made a bright pink M&M yet? Yes – I realize they make custom colored M&Ms that you can buy special but I mean – just imagine – you rip open a bag of the chocolate drops of paradise and OMG – there’s a fuschia M&M in there. Wouldn’t you run around screaming like you’d just struck gold? I would.

My 6 year old came crying to me the other night and I asked her what was wrong. She had just put itch cream on a mosquito bite and she was acting like someone had cut her leg off. She was in that much pain. She said to me, “Mom, the medicine hasn’t devolved yet.” WTF?? I looked at her like she had 4 heads and she said, “Geez Mom, the teacher told us that owwies will hurt until the medicine devolves. Duh.” Um yes. Duh.

I may or may not have spent more money than I’ve ever spent on a purse before solely based on the INSIDE of the purse. It’s a Coach Legacy purse. It’s white. It is To. Die. For. The inside is the famous Coach striped lining. I searched for weeks for it and had Jenny investigate its worth and authenticity. I’ve now had it over a week and haven’t even taken the packing paper out of it. WTF is wrong with me? (seriously – don’t answer that)

It’s no secret that Rambo and I work on multiple community boards. He’s the President for 2 boards and I clerk for 2 boards. It takes time, effort and commitment and you make the choice to do it. While we are in no way perfect – it just pisses us both off that some people say they’ll serve and they can’t even make once a month meetings. WTF is that about? If you don’t want to do it – don’t. If you do – show the f*ck up. Mmkkaayy?

My back is out – like massively. I put it out when I pulled our Harley down on Rambo and I and we had to push it back upright with our legs pinned under it. I’m so pissed I did that because my anxiety ridden self HATES the chiropractor but the normal person that I am is screaming in back pain and yelling WhyTF don’t you just go get your back fixed you idiot!? I’m a hot mess.

Martha Stewart (co-worker across the hall) – with her matching underwear and napkins – won the weight loss competition at work. I want to shank her – hard – in her perfectly manicured small toe that also matches her underwear. WhoTF does she think she is anyway?

That’s it for my WTF Wednesday. Whew…I feel better. How about you?


MandaPanda said...

What's with the spiders lately??? I think I need to stage an intervention about the purses...seriously...

jennxaz said...

those harleys are HEAVY. My aunt owns a harley store and I can't even move them around in the store..I am such a wimp!

Laura Belle said...

I saw that pic on FB that Jenny posted! I nearly reached through the interwebs and slapped her. I swear I shit a brick when I saw that. *SHIVERS*

becca said...

love your 6 yr old devovle brilliant

LDswims said...

I could kill your bestie for that spider post. Ok, not really, I love her too much, too! But dangit that damned spider is engraved on my brain now and I can't shut my brain down like I can with the interwebs. UGH!

OMG yes! I'd be in a bathtub filled with pink M&M's ALL THE TIME. Drooling and dreaming of perfect bliss and relaxation without custom order. Why are the best "things" custom?


Pics, please?


I sorry. I wish I could fix that for you. But no, I'll just be in pain with you for other reasons.

I got nothing...I despise MS.

Yes, I feel better, too - thanks. hehe

Love you.

Kristin50 said...

LOL I nearly died when I saw this picture as did Nichole as she has a phobia to spiders!!!!

LOL it was soo disgusting!! What the hell was the spider doing swimming in the pool with babies was my question. LOL

Sunshine's Heart said...

An interesting day for Draz. Your life is so exciting. I hate spiders so I'm glad you didn't repost it here. It would have given me nightmares for a week. Happy Hump Day.

Beth Ann said...

I'm sorry about your back!! Feel better.

I totally agree about the committment problems people seem to have. Drives me bonkers!

Amy said...

woman, keep that purse buying addiction under control! I'm with Jennxaz, you might need an Intervention! ;)

Sarah said...

Im reading this in bed and was just laughing so hard I nearly woke my husband! lol I love Wednesdays! Thanks for the laugh!


angel shrout said...

Step 1 admit you have an addiction.. ahem . The spider would not have phased me Ihave them all over the yard. Get your butt to the chiropractor woman, NOW>

InWeighOverMyHead said...

"Martha Stewart (co-worker across the hall) – with her matching underwear and napkins – won the weight loss competition at work. I want to shank her – hard – in her perfectly manicured small toe that also matches her underwear. WhoTF does she think she is anyway?"

OMGOSH. SOOOO funny! We all know someone like that... lol